HEALING

     When I lost Dean, I was broken, devastated and lost. I was searching for something, anything that could help me navigate through this life-changing trauma. I did not know how to survive and was on a quest for answers. 

     We formed the Dean DiGilio Memorial Foundation and immediately knew we wanted to help and make an impact. 

     The first place I was led was NOPE, the Narcotics Overdose Prevention and Education program that was becoming active in my area about 8-9 years ago. This is where parents who had lost a child formed a task force and were part of a new program in schools. We were educating children and parents in order to prevent the unimaginable from happening to them.  In essence, turning pain into purpose in memory of those we lost. We did this simply by sharing our heart wrenching stories. This was no easy task. Through this organization, I met an army of amazing women and became part of a vast network of support.  I was no longer alone in my grief. 

     Through this network, I became aware of education opportunities and became a CFRS, Certified Family Recovery Specialist.  I also recently became a Grief Educator through David Kessler.  I want to be a resource for parents facing the chaos of addiction and the inconceivable loss of a child, or those in early recovery with insurmountable emotional grief. I want to be, for those we are going to help, what Dean and I did not have on this journey.

     Although NOPE is no longer active in our area, I will always be grateful for the connections I made lasting over 10 years now.  I have several valuable friendships as a result. The education, information and therapeutic opportunities that came about have all led me towards healing.  I can now share it with others.

    I was also gifted the opportunity to attend a healing retreat in beautiful Costa Rica called Waves for Hope.  This voyage was absolutely a turning point in my healing process. I am grateful for the intangible gifts I received in Costa Rica and the invaluable bonds of friendship that I made there.   I work hard each and every day since, implementing practices learned there into my every day life. 

     The NOPE organization is also where I met Pam Moules, who founded Steps4hope in memory of her son, Jonathan. I started attending For Jonathan’s Sake, a therapeutic grief group for parents who have lost a child due to a substance related death. I attended the group since it’s beginning and I am now Co-facilitator of the group along with Ginny Burke. Our group is one of a kind.  Parents who are facing this devastating loss come and receive support and comfort in simply knowing they are not alone. They have the opportunity to share their stories when they are comfortable doing so, and have their grief witnessed.  Connections are made, bonds are formed, and healing begins. It is a safe place.  Pam, Ginny, and I are determined to do our best to really make a difference. We put so much time, effort, and energy into constantly educating ourselves further in order to best promote healing, group therapy. 

     My recovery and grief work has become a huge part of my life. I was also given the opportunity to write a column in Philadelphia Rowhome magazine, sharing my experiences. I am so grateful for this platform.  My mission here is just to offer a grain of hope for someone who is struggling to hold onto.

     Aside from all this, I do my best each day to love my family with all that I am, because I know that tomorrow is not promised. 

 Dorthi